Say you won’t let go

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ReaganI have 5 kids. I’ve dealt with more tantrums that I can count. I’ve been pooped on, spit up on, and thrown up on. By now, I consider my self a pro at all of the above. My middle child is about to start kindergarten. There will probably be tears. Wait….I know there will be. But I’ve been through it and know what to expect.

My oldest is starting high school in about a week and this is uncharted territory for me. She will now start making her own decisions that will directly affect her.  I recently allowed her to get Instagram. Apparently Facebook is no longer in for teens. Snap chat is next. I could probably go on all day about social media but I won’t. I’ll sum it up to this. I can’t keep her sheltered for the rest of her left. She has already seen poor judgement made by other kids. We talk all the time about what’s right and what’s wrong. We talk about how one poor decision can effect the rest of her life and that’s not just with social media. The realization of her no longer being my little girl anymore pains me a bit.

I only have four more years left and did I do my job well enough for her to be successful. I want her to be strong, independent and confident. I want her to know that she can do anything that she puts her mind to. I want her to be respectful but I also want her to demand respect. I watch her play sports and I wish she realized the talent she truly has. I hear her sing and I wonder how she has no idea how amazing she truly sounds. She is beautiful inside and out.

As she embarks on this journey, I know that this will be the most amazing next four years of her life. I know she will make so many new friends and new memories. I’m so excited for her and selfishly sad. Sad that little by little she won’t need me as much every day. But when she does, I’ll be there.

Although I worry that I just don’t have enough time these next four years, I’m also excited to see her grow into an amazing woman. I want her to gain strength and confidence and know there are no limitations in this world.

** And yes, this is my daughter singing “Say you won’t let go” and playing the ukulele**

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